Behold...

...the creation!

I have been inspired to start a blog, which is a strange inspiration, to be quite fair. I don't have anything much worth saying, neither do i expect my thought patterns, musings and rambles are of particular benefit to anyone who may happen to chance upon them. But I can read, and I can write, and I feel these two skills are important enough to feature more highly in my professional life. Where I find an obstacle, however, is in the direction my career path has taken me. I've had load of jobs and worked hard at uni to achieve that honours degree. I have many hobbies and interests, charm, personality, razorsharp wit and a wonderfully dry sense of humour. Yet somehow, when jobs were being handed out at the beginning of time, the gods thought it prudent to deal me the "waitress" card. Seriously, I am beginning to think I have been implanted with a chip that brings me back time and time again to delivering food from one room to another. I have been to 22 different countries, seen some amazing things and have a wealth of stories behind them, and yet my life can be so easily defined by the long hours spent running with food. That's right, I'm doing the same work as when I was 17, and getting paid less for it. Go figure.

It makes me wonder what is so inherently waitress-y about me that allows the universe to direct me back to this brand of occupation. I'm not even that good at it. Not that it has much science behind it, or any real secrets about it (though one of my co-workers did tell me not to put cutlery in the bin or serviettes in the dishwasher. Thanks Simon, boy would my face have been red if I was left to figure that one out for myself). I'm clumsy and I drop things, say hi to people I've greeted just a moment before, and wouldn't remember the wine list if it were all Ribena. I seriously do not know why people hire me. Which then begs the question, why didn't the universe pick something more suited to me? Here is a concise lists of jobs which I feel would result in more success than my waitressing ventures:
International Woman of Mystery
Extreme Pole Vaulter
Professional Tap Dancer
Victoria Cross Maker
Novelty Hat Designer
Tight Rope Walker
Interpretive Ballerina
Outlaw Biker
Mafia Don
Beer Baron
Professional Blogger

...to name a few. Do you think it's too late for that chip in my brain to be reset?